8 Reasons Why Our Marriage Would Not Work — And Yet It Does

Voltaire and I usually walk together in the morning after working from home on the graveyard shift for the same company.

On our way home, he put his arm around me, his right hand landing on my shoulder and said, “We’re a miracle, don’t you think so?”

I thought for a second and asked back, “Why?”

“Well, in a normal world probably we wouldn’t be married at all.”

Thinking of that statement, I realized that yes, there are reasons why our marriage would not work BUT IT DOES! Let me count them for you:

  1. He’s not even my type of guy.
    When I was in high school, I prefer guys who wear eyeglasses and behind those are eyes that become slits when they smile or laugh. In other words, I prefer a Chinese-looking guy, a Chinito. And being a Chinito comes being fair-skinned. Voltaire, is dark-skinned, but wears eyeglasses. Not Chinito, though. But just because he’s not my type, doesn’t mean I don’t find him attractive. I do.
  2. We don’t have a lot in common.
    We may share the same values and goals, yes. But we don’t share the same interests and passions. You would see couples do the same thing together, but we’re far from that. He’s into anime, wrestling, and fan fiction. I’m into a lot of crime fiction and a little bit of arts and crafts. We would do things on our own and circle back to each other for a kiss or a chat or when hanging out.
  3. He finds order in chaos and I couldn’t accept that.
    As a woman, and a nurse/medical technologist at that, I prefer things in order and clean. He’s the complete opposite. He wants his space in chaos and he finds organization in that kind of state. You now have an idea what do we usually fight about.
  4. I want to cook but…
    I love preparing pasta dishes. We both prefer lean meat, no fat. However, I eat fruits and vegetables, he doesn’t. And to make matters worse, he’s allergic to onions and garlic.
  5. He reads while eating
    We both love reading. I read when I have the time. He reads most of the time — even while eating or in the toilet, you know what I mean…
  6. We differ in our TV and film preferences
    Seldom do we watch TV or film together. And that only happens if we both like the TV show or film. Come to think of it, we both love comedy, the only genre we share together.
  7. I hate it when he rushes me to finish my grocery or shopping.
    I prefer going to the grocery or shopping alone because I would be able to choose. With him, everything has to be fast. And I ended up forgetting to buy an item or two.
  8. I don’t know how to ride a bike.
    He loves biking. If given the chance, he would go biking to any place. I would rather play chess or badminton.

But how come we lasted 15 years?

Because we decided to love each other for better or worse, through sickness and in health, through sick and sin, err… thick and thin. Even on those days when we truly can’t stand to be in the same room because of his messiness. Even on those days that we face our own computers on two separate tables inside the same room. Even when I spend more than two thousand pesos on groceries on a single purchase.

Happy 15th wedding anniversary, Volts!

Issa Bacsa

Filipino freelance writer and author, Gen X mother to a Gen Z daughter, retrogamer, binge-watcher.